Scotland the brave

There are many changes that could be made in Scotland to make it a better place. Here are a few of The Pop Cop’s suggestions:

  • Give all Scots media training from the age of four to prevent that natural discomfort and social awkwardness they will inevitably ooze in later life whenever placed in front of a TV camera or radio microphone.
  • Convince the service industry that it’s not in their best interests to employ joyless and apathetic staff.
  • Swap all neds with refugees and asylum-seekers: not only would the exchange bring in people actually willing to contribute to society, it would take Scotland off the bottom of the world’s most unattractive inhabitants list.

One of the things that should not change, however, is the practice in Scots law that allows terminally-ill prisoners to be released early, as utilised in last week’s decision to free Lockerbie bomber Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed Al Megrahi to spend his final months of life with his family.

Quite frankly, Scotland should be applauded and hailed as a shining example to all as a compassionate and decent country, not derided and publicly “shamed” by not only the American governmental and judicial hierarchy, but those within our borders who are more concerned about petty political point-scoring than having the balls to stand up and defend our nation’s honour.

Take a bow Justice Secretary Kenny MacAskill, the man behind this unpopular but brave decision: “In Scotland, we are a people who pride ourselves on our humanity. Compassion and mercy are about upholding the beliefs we seek to live by, remaining true to our values as a people – no matter the severity of the provocation or the atrocity perpetrated.”

And just to prove we can forgive the name-calling that has been directed our way from across the Atlantic, Los Angeles band JACK’S MANNEQUIN can expect to be afforded a typically fervent welcome in Glasgow next week.

The Pop Cop loves them so much we traversed to a whole other country (England) to see them play earlier this year and personally appealed to them to visit Scotland next time. See, not all Americans hate us.

Jack’s MannequinDark Blue
August 31, QMU, Glasgow (tickets)

I Hate Scotland

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